Ghost Hunters Academy

Ghost Hunters Academy – Almost making Ghost Lab look good

After just two episodes I stand in awe of the garbage the Ghost Hunters team will slap their name on. It’s almost neck and neck as to which is the dumber show, this horrid creation and the pathetic "contestants" they brought on board, or the tragic and inept antics of the Ghost Lab team and their claims of the paranormal. Just when you thought Ghost Hunters couldn’t get any worse, they spin off this bizarre creation.

Tune in to watch Steve and Tango try to act grown up as they travel across the country in their tricked out black Winnebago trying to teach a group of misfits what it’s like to participate in the non-paying world of paranormal investigations. A field of inquiry they can’t quite quantify, have a hard time justifying, and don’t really get paid for. Umm, what are we watching this for again?

I’ve only seen two episodes, but I can’t bring myself to watch any more. The very thought of seeing Heathyr with her fingers in her ears while the rest of the team discusses the location and it’s history makes my skin crawl. Morbid curiosity makes me want to tune in just to see how bad it gets, but common sense (and a heaping bottle of tequila) keeps me from actually clicking "Play". I just can’t do it. This show doesn’t have a single element that interests me, and like the regular Ghost Hunters this show and I have to part ways. It’s just not in the cards baby. It’s pretty bad when there are as many Ghost Hunter spinoffs as there are CSI spinoffs. When Ghost Hunters: Miami comes out, I’ll tune in. Until then, this show is going into the trash.

The last hope is Ghost Hunter International, but so far, that show is in the wind and MIA. And from the rumors I’ve seen who knows who’ll actually be coming back to do the show.

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Ghost Hunters Academy – Episode 2 – Wilmington NC

The first minute of this episode pretty much set the tone for how things were going to play out for the investigation and quite possibly the rest of the season.

Heathyr couldn’t have been any more juvenile within that first minute. She flatly says they need to be careful of what they say since she doesn’t want to hear it when discussing the history of the location. The only thing missing is her singing “La La La La I can’t hear you” as she had her fingers in her ears. My God, what are you four? I’m embarrassed I’m even watching this show right now.

The gang shows their complete ineptitude and stupidity by failing to get anything set up the first night. They have to redo the tour because Heathyr was pouting like a spoiled brat on the deck and the rest of the team failed to take notes about the activity or where to place equipment. Seriously, these were the five best people who sent in applications? I can’t even imagine the crazies you turned down.

After stumbling and bumbling around in the dark Steve and Tango take the reins and get the group sorted out. They get the equipment set up and finally get to investigating. Even as they are investigating it’s still pretty much a disaster since they have no idea what they’re doing. It’s pretty comical in a sad and tragic sort of way.

As they’re packing up the gear they’re already talking about who the competition leader is, how great they are, who the natural leader of the team is, what kind of contributions they can make and how they’re more suited to stay than everyone else. Watching blatant ego and vanity is always fun.

The investigation is over pretty quickly and then it’s time to check the results. They have to analyze on their own and not share their results. Since they aren’t “tagging” the audio as to where they are in the room, who made what noise or cough, there are all sorts of extraneous sounds that they have to throw out. They pretty much just wasted two days and embarrassed the hell out of themselves. Have you by chance actually watched a paranormal investigation on television?

Ghost Hunters Academy is proving to be a waste and the five people they selected don’t even rank as amateurs. Heathyr is just plain embarrassing with the way she acts. Send this four year old home to mommy and try again. Susan is a dolt for a slew of reasons. Actually, everyone is a pain in the ass. Ship this group back home, they suck.

This really seems to be heading towards a show like Survivor and America Idol, both of which, I hate. I’m not sure I can stand watching another episode of this one.

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Ghost Hunters Academy – Episode 1 – Fort Mifflin

What do you get when you mix the showing signs of age Ghost Hunters, with the riveting stupidity of Survivor and add the hack talent of American Idol? Yep, you get the show now known as Ghost Hunters Academy.

Here are some new recruits who will learn the secrets of being a successful Ghost Hunter. There’s more to it than just sitting in the dark talking to a recorder and Steve and Tango will show these youngsters the ropes.

So what do we get out of these new faces?

After having a breakdown Susan admits she has empathetic feelings for the spirits. Funny thing is Heathyr the so called medium didn’t feel anything in the same room. Well, she does begin to say she might be feeling something, but then Susan steals all her thunder. But wait that’s not the biggest thing, it’s the fact that she held these mysterious abilities back and didn’t tell anyone about them. Now she’s skating on thin ice because they can’t trust her and who knows if she’ll be around for the next exciting episode. Queue the dramatic soap opera music and if you can pan to someone lying in a hospital bed that would be perfect.

Heathyr (the medium) tries to separate herself from the group by not going on the tour so her “abilities” won’t be tainted by knowing the history of the location. Considering she signed up so she could learn how to perform paranormal investigations it would sort of make sense that she actually goes along. This feels like a really cheesy way to get some alone time on camera. Strangely, we don’t see her abilities come into play at all during the actual investigation.

As far as the investigation goes this should basically be called the sit down show since no one actually feels it necessary to walk anywhere while they’re investigating. The guys sit on their asses in the Casemate, the girls sit on the floor in the Officer’s Quarters, and then Ben and his entourage sit on their butts in the Powder Magazine Room. I guess gone are the days when they would actually check the place out and try to debunk and explain the mysteries of a location. Why am I feeling that breeze? Where is that light coming from? What made that sound? It’s easier to sit in the corner and say you see a shadow and wait for it to come back versus actually wandering around to see what made that shadow.

This first episode was painful to watch. These “contestants” are complete blockheads. I guess they’re trying to add drama back to the show since the evidence isn’t really panning out these days. If I can sit through the junk that is Ghost Lab and give those crazy Texans a chance I can give this show another try as well. Not every first episode is a winner so it may take some time to find their groove, but if we get into all the troubles and problems of life as a Ghost Hunter and being in school and dating and parties and boyfriends I’m the hell outta here, I have no time for Paranormal 90210.

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