Ghost Adventures

Ghost Adventures – Island of the Dolls – S10E04

imageWe’re off to Mexico for another episode of lies, deceit and misinformation. Zak and Aaron are visiting the Island of the Dolls which we first saw in an episode of Destination Truth with Josh Gates. Yes, this is a wickedly creepy place riddled old, dirty, rotting dolls that are strung up in trees, across lines and on the walls on the small hut. It doesn’t matter what you’re afraid of, seeing all those severed heads and broken bodies would give anyone the creeps and make you jump. That being said, I’m going to ridicule the hell out of Zak for being a complete pansy on this investigation, so much so, that he nearly knocks Aaron down when one of the dolls make a noise behind him. Way to be a man, Zak.

The history of the island goes back to Don Julian who was grief stricken over a girl who drown while he was unable to save her. He then brought dolls to this island in memoriam of her and for decades he has placed dolls all throughout the island. Don Julian even died on this island and it said a water spirit (mermaid) took away his spirit. Unfortunately, Don Julian never cleaned any of these dolls and they are covered in cobwebs and are home to nasty looking spiders.

As the investigation begins, Zak is utterly befuddled as to how a fire could start on the island in a fire pit, at a campground, loaded with supplies and with a metal grate over the rocks. Dear me, are you really that stupid? You’re not alone out there! Someone is camping there! It’s pretty damn obvious considering all the supplies they brought. Not a single thing paranormal about that.

Next we have Zak bringing out the most cursed doll in the world and some cats running scared. This coincides with some dolls laughing. Of course this must be the paranormal rather than a couple of cats running from humans and someone leaving a motion sensing doll to scare people who come out there. Just because Zak is touching and waving his hand in front of a couple of dolls on one walls, doesn’t mean the doll making the noise isn’t on the opposite wall. This is also the part where Zak nearly bulldozes Aaron to the ground as he runs for his life. I’m pretty sure Zak ruined those pants he was wearing.

As they continue on into the night, they bring in Drunk Pedro to confirm he hears the voice of Don Julian on the different devices Zak has brought. They even bring another doll that can measure readings and what do you know, it doesn’t go off. Shocking.

However, Zak is firmly convinced that spirit energy comes darting out of the shrine to Don Julian. This is obviously a mouse, but oh no, this is spirit energy according to Zak. Funny how this black mass looks like a rodent.

Zak finally gets up the stones to take the haunted doll out of the bag and place it next to the one that can take readings. Again, nothing happens, yet Zak swears the ground underneath the doll gets hotter even though the readings from the camera don’t detect this massive temperature spike.

While Zak claims they’re in the middle of nowhere, it’s pretty damn obvious they aren’t. Clearly cats are on this supposed island, there are dogs in the distance and if there are dogs there are owners and that’s who’s making the noises they keep hearing. To play on the legend of this island, someone has placed sound activated dolls out there, but of course Zak isn’t going to show those. And clearly someone is out there camping, but this too must be the work of the spirit world. I mean how would it look if there were other people on their haunted and isolated dessert isle. Boy, wouldn’t they feel silly.

Yet again an absolute farce of an episode with fake evidence at every turn. No matter how dramatic Zak makes it out to be, there is nothing haunted about this island, it’s just creepy. Yes, bodies were thrown into the river, but none of them are making an appearance despite Zak’s antics. This is just more confirmation that Zak and his team are making stuff up and are either staging evidence or bending what they see to fit their horror story. You can’t help but laugh at these guys.

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Are you really going to tell me that’s not a mouse?

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Ghost Adventures – The Zozo Demon – S10E03

imageWe’re off to Oklahoma City to investigate a house where a man used a Talking Board also known as the Ouija to contact the spirit world and it’s believed he let through a spirit named Zozo. This is supposed to be a dark energy and one that cause harm and even inflict sexual assault on it’s victims. The door was originally opened by Darren who believes he was possessed by the spirit. He also states that odd things have been going on inside the house and now he and his wife are afraid of their home.

Zak states that Zozo is an evil entity and there have numerous reports of Zozo being conjured by these boards. He then meets with Robert Murch, Chairman of the Talking Board Historical Society. Interestingly, Robert says the more people believe in something the more real it is to them. He also states a lot of people say they contact Zozo. However, from listening to him, he doesn’t really state that using the Spirit Board actually opens a door. It’s more that if you think something has happened, then in your mind it did. Basically, if you wander around in the dark with the idea you’re chasing the devil, then in your mind that’s the reality. That’s the crux of it, you’ve convinced yourself something has happened regardless of whether or not it really did. So when Zak convinces himself that a place is haunted then in his mind everything is slanted to that end. Regardless of how things really play out, that place is haunted. And obviously, Zak believes this place has the devil inside.

To start things off and to show just how dangerous this house is, they bring in the handyman and have him sit on the stairs. Within seconds he’s saying something is brushing up against him and he bolts for the exit. Zak decides he needs to sit there with his Mel Meter that shows 1.0 and 1.1 repeatedly as a reading. To Zak, this is Zozo being spelled out. Ok, sure, whatever Zak.

There is a lot of talk about all the noises that go in the house. Not to be rude or judgmental, but the house is a shit box. Look at the walls. Look at the stairs. Look at the basement. The whole damn thing is falling apart. The stairs are insanely narrow and sagging. The wood is split, the walls are dirty as hell and everything about this place makes me feel like it’s going to topple over or someone is going to fall through the floor. Really? You’re surprised this place has creaks and makes noise? God only knows what’s living in those walls.

The investigation consists of Nick and Darren sitting around the Talking Board with the intent of contacting Zozo. They have to throw out their cautionary words of using the Board and opening a portal to hell. Again, I’m simply stunned with how easy it is to conjure demons from the depths of hell using cardboard covered in letters.

It should come as no surprise that the planchette starts to move back and forth and spell out Zozo. Wouldn’t we all be embarrassed if it spelled out something else? Of course, Nick repeatedly states he’s not moving it and it’s all outside of his control. Just who is he trying to convince?

But it’s during this time that the house starts to make all sorts of noises such as bangs and footsteps. Nick speaks of electricity charging through his body and down to his fingertips. The same fingertips that he assures everyone are barely touching the board.

Kathleen, Darren’s wife, decides this is a good time to make an exit because it’s all just to scary and dangerous for her. Nick and Darren keep at it and Zak is mystified how the word Zozo keeps getting spelled out.

Kathleen then makes a reappearance in a confused state and her belt undone. Zak jumps to the conclusion that Kathleen has been assaulted by the spirit energy. Kathleen even states the demon wanted to see her tits. Pervy little devil isn’t he? Dramatic effect for the sake of ratings? Clearly not.

As usual when there is supposed demonic energy around, Zak sits off on his own in a trance like state. He’s caught in a web of emotion and can’t move. He gets stuck like that a lot. Kathleen seemed to slip out of the demonic grasp and has wandered outside and disappeared. Oh no, she’s been lured outside by a demonic force. Zak jumps into his rent-an-suv and gives chase. He doesn’t have idea which way she went or how the neighborhood is laid out, but that won’t stop him. Good thing the pursuit comes to an end mere moments later when Darren catches up with him and says he took Kathleen back to the hotel. Hmm, she has her belt undone and a lusty look in her eye and there is a hotel near by. Say no more my good man!!

Nothing is said of where she went or what happened. It’s better to remain vague and mysterious about these things. Zak links the howling of the dogs he hears in the neighborhood to this visit by Zozo.

They decide switch things up a bit and have Darren work the Spirit Board with Jay, the other sound technician for the show. He had a bad experience using the Ouija years ago where a friend tried to stab him in the throat with a dagger after they conjured their own Zozo. Boy, that Zozo gets around doesn’t he?

With Darren and Jay at the helm the dark force spells out kill and that he will manifest within Nick. More trouble breaks out as Zak tells Nick what to do while he’s safely tucked away somewhere else. Even the demon thinks it’s funny as he spells out HA-HA, because that’s what spirits do. They don’t actually laugh into the digital records and say, Zak you’re a jackass, they spell it out like it’s instant messaging.

There are more bumps and bangs and even a couple more unexplained voices. It’s all manner of chaos when the devil is in town. And as they decide to wrap things up, they’re on edge that the devil is going to come through Nick.

Yes indeed, we had plenty of bangs and bumps and knocks in this POS house. This place is a wreck so who knows where all these noises are coming from. I’m not going to believe that the devil or some minion of the devil known as Zozo is going to choose this place to make his grand entrance. And I’m still not going to believe that the Ouija is a tool for contact spirits. I don’t care that Nick felt the planchette move. This all seems like the plot of a bad B-rate horror movie. Could it be any more cliché? Could it be any more predictable? The only thing missing was pea soup.

Again, if you think something is real, your mind makes it real. After all, isn’t that what the Matrix taught us?

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Oh my goodness, oh my damn!  Have a look at these screen grabs. The top picture is taken of Kathleen at the top of the stairs. In my recording this is at 20:27. The second image is Kathleen on the stairs supposedly taken less than 5 seconds later. In my recording this is 20:32. Notice her belt is indeed undone and hanging open.

Just as Ash commented, something isn’t right about this. You can call it what you want, but to me this looks like a whole lot of faked evidence. Anyone with an HD capture of this same time frame want to comment?

It took several years for Jason and Grant to get caught with this same sort of silliness, but it eventually came back around on them. Looks like we have the same thing going on here. I think it’s time to call bullshit on the Ghost Adventures team.

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Ghost Adventures – Lemp Mansion and Brewery – S10E02

imageFor this episode the guys head out to St. Louis to investigate the Lemp Mansion and Brewery. The Lemp family came to St. Louis from Germany and established the first Lager Brewery. This was a new style of ale for the region and it took off with great success. Unfortunately, the family was plagued with tragedy as 3 members of the family committed suicide in the home.  William Lemp Sr and Jr both killed themselves in the house via a gunshot wound to the head. Charles Lemp later died the same way and was the last Lemp to live in the house. Not to be outdone, Elsa Lemp, daughter to William Sr also took her own life by way of the gun, but she died at a different residence. Clearly, there are cases of instability and most like mental illness in this poor family.

But mental illness isn’t good enough for Zak and the gang. Oh no, this has to be the work of a curse and it has to be tied to the Native Americans. The problems with this family have are because of dark energy and must be linked to the tunnels under the mansion and brewery. It’s rumored the Indians used these tunnels and they of course suspect restless spirits are at work down there. This is confirmed when they aren’t able to open one of the doors that leads into the tunnels. Let’s just ignore the fact that the workman says he doesn’t have the keys.

This certainly ranks as one of the worst episodes and really proves that Zak is an arrogant ass, a bully and quite frankly a pansy. I first have to say I’m sick and tired of their cut scene reenactments that are so over the top as to look stupid. The whole intro to this show talks about their credibility and their reputation and then within seconds they’re showboating and using theatrics to try and make the place dark and sinister. It’s pretty damn pathetic.

But on to the investigation. It should come as no surprise that even before they walk in the door, Zak is talking about all the dark energy and the family being cursed. This coupled with the horror movie style dramatizations seals the deal that this place is demonic right off the bat. No need to be objective, their minds are made up and they are shaping the show to fit their mindset. Is it me or does it look like they’re modeling their characters after those in Grave Encounters?

The claims are also pretty damn outrageous. Pictures are supposedly turned upside down and chairs move around the place. There is also the feeling of sadness and loss as you go from room to room. There is even talk that the spirits yell at you.

As they investigate they of course see orbs of energy flying around and every voice hey hear is dark and sinister. There’s even the standard slamming of the metal door.

The big moment to me was Zak down in the cellar of this building where he about soils himself, yet again. He claims he’s uncontrollably staring into the room and then when he hears a noise he jumps out of his skin and damn near knocks everyone out of the way to make an escape. He then bullies Aaron to go into the same room because he’s too damn scared to do it himself. Seems like Aaron and Nick are a bit tired of the crap and opt to leave him down there alone while they check out the upper floors. Zak damn near has a fit and starts spewing obscenities at them. They keep going and ditch him.

Shortly thereafter Zak’s flashlight goes out and he instantly starts to panic. He’s shaking, his voice is cracking and he demands Nick and Aaron come back to save him. You can even see when he hears a noise he almost soils himself a second time he’s so damn scared. I was laughing at his plight and how much of a pansy he is when left on his own. He did this same damn thing last episode where some blob shows up on his Xbox Kinect and his voice goes into a shrill panic that something is coming right at him. My god, he’s been doing this for 10 years and this is what happens when he’s alone? Grow a set!!

Since nothing is happening with this investigation they turn to the standby of orbs and "I feel heavy sadness in this room". Junk is flying around the room which Zak states is spirit energy and while laying on the bed in the Master Bedroom he says how sad he feels. Give  it a rest.

They didn’t capture anything of note in this investigation, but since they made such a big deal about the dark energy, curses and Indian burial grounds, they have to milk everything little thing as much as they can. Plus, what sort of haunted restaurant can the owners run if these guys don’t find anything? Sales would plummet!

Yes, the Lemp family suffered a great deal of loss in this house, but they don’t have anything that supports their baseless claims. They scared the crap out of themselves while standing in the dark like Shaggy and Scooby. Seems more likely this family had illness and they sadly crumbled to the pressures they put themselves under.

This episode was a joke and I can do nothing but laugh at just how childish Zak can be.

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Ghost Adventures – The Queen Mary – S10E01

imageFor this adventure Zak, Nick and Aaron head out to California to visit the floating museum of the Queen Mary, a steam liner that one served as an opulent cruise ship for the rich and famous, but was then pressed into service as a troop transport. While it didn’t see actual combat, it brought back plenty of men who did. And it wasn’t the enemy that caused damage to the ship, but an accident that involved it’s own escort ship. The two collided which killed hundreds of men on the smaller boat. From reports, many of those deaths were caused when men were literally pulled into the wake of the massive propellers of the Queen Mary. Certainly a grim way to go.

There are reports of figures and the voice of a little girl heard in multiple places from the pool to the hallways. Interestingly, there are no reports of a girl ever being killed on board. There are also reports of numerous voices as well as shadow figures. Multiple groups have investigated this location including Peter James who may have done first documented paranormal investigation on board. His video also records the voice of a girl. Some claim it’s the same little girl. Based on the activity, many claim this to be the most haunted ship in the world. Mind you, they never say how many ships are on the list. While the ship didn’t see combat deaths did occur, both from wounded soldiers being brought back and from prisoners who apparently died in the less than spectacular conditions below decks.

Right from the start the team feels like they’re experiencing the paranormal and without any real evidence to support it, they conclude it to be dark energy. There is a claim the voice of the little girl heard by Peter James is the same girl that was captured 20 years later. There was some sort of forensic analysis, but let’s not give out the name of the company that did the work. that would be silly. This feel of dread seems to be based on feeling dizzy in the area by the pool and that the "voices" seem angry. Billy feels he’s choking on smoke while filming and a bad vibe is running through the place. They haven’t captured any real evidence yet, but it’s time to draw conclusions

Zak brings in Debby Constantino to validate the voices they hear. Without skipping a beat she picks out the voices are angry and that since there is no reported death of a little girl, the voice must be an imposter and something sinister. Zak has contacted some friends of Peter James who brought his favorite jackets with them. Zak jumps at the chance to do a séance (which he’s been against multiple times in the past because of the evil spirits that slip through) and immediately states he hears a door opening which must be the presence of Peter. He also concludes that balls of light are heading straight for those same jackets. Any ball of light they see is deemed spirit energy and it always seems to end up in someone. It either comes down on top of their heads or sneaks up and goes in through their backs.

As the investigation goes on they feel the presence of someone, Nick claims to get pushed right around the door 13 where a sailor was killed. And according to Zak it was a suspicious death. No evidence to support that claim, but that’s what he’s going with. They see a figure move in front of an open door and hear a girl calling out to them. Oddly, the voice of the girl sounds remarkably like Debby Constantino who just happens to be off by herself. Additionally, Zak says he sees more orbs making their way into both him and Debby as they work their way around the ship. Clearly a ship of this age can’t have dust or particles flying around, it has to be spirit energy.

Armed with what appears to be a Kinect attached to a camera or some such, Zak claims to get a figure coming right at him. Oh course, he nearly soils himself as it sounds like he’s on the verge of screaming. It’s an interesting phenomenon to be sure, but it could be anything and who knows what their device is registering. They put a lot of faith in an Xbox toy from Microsoft.

So far the ship has revealed orbs, voices, bangs, knocks, pushes and a full figure walking in front of a door. Oh my goodness, it’s the most haunted ship in the world!

From, where I’m sitting, I’m not convinced by a single piece of evidence they caught. I don’t believe the ship is anything more than a creaking, old, metallic boat that makes plenty of odd, but perfectly natural noises and I don’t believe any of the voices they captured are real. They went into this investigation utterly convinced the ship is haunted and as soon as they put a foot on the ship they state their is a demonic presence. How in the hell can they be objective and debunk anything when their mind is already made up? It happens all the time, but is more and more blatant with every episode.

I’ve been less than impressed with how Ghost Adventures conducts themselves and this has pretty much pushed me over the edge. It’s really getting hard to tune in for this nonsense any more. It’s degraded to showboating and overly dramatizing every little thing that happens. Every place they visit is haunted, all the spirits are evil, all the orbs are trying to take over Zak and demons are parading around as kids. And this is what they believe before opening the front door. The idea of waiting for the evidence to come in before coming to a conclusion is a lost idea for these guys.

I used to enjoy the locations they went to and hearing about the history. It’s just become too "emo" for me. Not everything is a portal to hell. As with so many other shows, I think this one has run it’s course.

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